I often receive feedback from my online editing tool that analyzes my prose.  It tells me that 2 of 20 sentences is hard to read or 3 of 20 sentences is very hard to read. I take it in and then take a look at my language. To tidy up the terminology, or not, that is the question.  But can I, really? Here are a few examples of hard, and very hard, to read.

Hard to read

Journey is an end-to-end platform with verified identity at the root of trust between businesses and customers.

To achieve zero trust and a Zero Knowledge environment Journey provides two layers of keys and two layers of encryption.

Very hard to read

The Journey approach builds on the latest in cryptography and cloud orchestration with a streamlined customer experience around security and privacy.

Journey APIs enable secure transfer of encrypted information between customers, enterprises, and verification partners.

Customer authentication uses digital certificates to maintain authentication and it travels with the caller.

 

Hard to Read but Easy to Use

Security is complicated,  but Journey products are clear. Journey never sees or stores your personal data.  It might be hard to read about, but it’s easy to use.

Sheryl Headshot

Storyteller and translator of technical jargon. BA in English from UC Riverside.